Coming to grips with growing up

"Dear brothers and sisters, when I was with you I couldn’t talk to you as I would to spiritual people. I had to talk as though you belonged to this world or as though you were infants in the Christian life. I had to feed you with milk, not with solid food, because you weren’t ready for anything stronger. And you still aren’t ready, for you are still controlled by your sinful nature." I Cor.3:1-3 (NLT)

There are certain books Christians should never read...that is, if we are happy with our safe, mediocre relationship with the Lord. One such book is "The Importance of being Foolish" by Brennan Manning. In the book, Manning talks about how our desire for security, pleasure, and power become diversions that numb our desires for the things of God.

I am reminded of Jesus' words, "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled." (Matt.5:6) Maybe we're not hungry because we're already full of other things...perhaps the cares of this life, the obsession with our financial security, the need for approval, and for survival. The life Jesus calls us to is not safe; it is a landscape constantly changing and shifting. It is life requiring faith and trust which, of course, you don't need either when things are in your control. We don't like change and uncertainty so we go to great lengths to avoid this tumult designed by God to help us grow. To quote John Eldredge, we go after "Lovers less wild." These "things of earth" distract us from the child-like simple faith of seemingly reckless abandon that Christ calls us to.

As Manning further points out, "Creativity and flexibility give way to repetition and rigidity." We become mummified by middle age. "Fear of failure prevents any surprise by the Spirit. As security seekers, we become enemies of openness."

Of course, when we shut down all the machinery of adventure and change, we begin to feel secure, but this quiet desperation of our hermetically sealed existence drives us to seek compensation through all kinds of pleasurable experiences. Rest and relaxation are good balancers to revitalize body and spirit, but when they are sought for themselves, they send us on a roller-coaster ride of sensations and thrills, each one needing to be greater than the last.

To quote Manning again, "How easy this quest for pleasure turns into obsession and obsession turns into a kind of soul death." He goes on to say, "Yet many Christians practice an ambivalent "prudence of the flesh" that seeks a sort of guilded mediocrity: the self is carefully distributed between flesh and spirit, with a watchful eye on both..."It is a vision of those who have received the Spirit but remain spiritual infants because they do not subject themselves fully to the domination of the Spirit; they yield to their passions, thus letting their drives confine them to an infantile spirituality. Or to quote the Scarlet Pimpernel... " There is nothing so bad in life as something that is not so bad."

The final leg of this spirit-numbing triad is the lust for power. We have convinced ourselves that we must have power (prestige, influence, reputation) in order to be happy. We conclude that a successful person is a happy person. And Manning astutely points out that "Our ineffectiveness in developing deeply loving relationships--with others as well as with God--is rooted in our power addiction. We see other people as objects that either enhance or endanger our prestige." Even my desire to bring this subject up in my ponderings (along with other books I talk about) could be my own way of achieving recognition as an "interesting" person. Selah.

One more quote on power. "Christians who succeed in seizing power, collecting disciples, acquiring knowledge, acheiving status and prestige, and controlling the world are estranged from the mind of Jesus. We grow fearful when a disciple swipes our baton, cynical when feedback is negative, fitful when challenged, and distraught when defeated." I must ask myself as a pastor, will I use position and God-given authority to appease my need for approval and prestige? If I cannot give up control of my own life to the ways of the Spirit, I will also not give up control over other's lives that God has placed in my care. Like I said, not very comforting words...but good for me, nonetheless.

Finally, Manning summarizes with this..."Life driven by our desire for security, pleasure, and power dims the Light within us and introduces unnecessary mental and emotional sufferings, which are often misconstrued as spriritual trials or the inevitable growth pains of life in the Spirit. This is erroneous discernment. They are borne out of our own will, not the will of God." (italics added for emphasis) I really think we need to ponder this one.

So I am left asking myself, what is stopping my own growth in the Spirit? Am I so addicted to security and the need for approval that I won't venture out of the boat with Jesus? To die to my self-designed life for one not so comfortable and predictable? A life requiring my utter dependence upon the Lover of my Soul? Have I numbed and shut down these wild places in my own heart and substituted security, pleasure, and the need for power?

Like the children in Narnia learned about Aslan, I must learn that God is not tame, but He is good.